"Satire is a genre of the visual, literary, and performing arts, usually in the form of fiction and less frequently non-fiction, in which vices, follies, abuses, and shortcomings are held up to ridicule, with the intent of shaming individuals, corporations, government, or society itself into improvement."
I contracted some form of intestinal parasite while elk hunting last fall. It was very similar to giardia, a tiny parasite that causes the diarrheal disease giardiasis. The symptoms I experienced were very similar to giardia, and included watery diarrhea, alternating with greasy stools, fatigue, cramps, and really bad stomach pain due to gas and cramps.
This situation lasted for several months, staring in early September and going well into January. (Talk about a way to open the new year!) And given the timeline, well, yes, that resulted in me having exceptionally bad gas and diarrhea entire hunting season. During the day, toilet paper was used at a breakneck pace. At night, sleeping patterns were disrupted with night-time stomach cramps. Throughout the day, sharting was a considerable, ongoing problem, with a daily battle of "is this gas....or something more?!" I quickly learned that Farts.....well, you just can't trust them.
Fortunately, I was working from home due to the COVID pandemic, making the quick "runs" to the toilet a non-issue. (It was a perfect year to have month-long bouts of diarrhea and be working at home, close to the safety of one's toilet!) While this constant issue was a considerable inconvenience, it also came with a series of visits to the doctor's office, providing bodily-fluid samples, and other "samples" - it really was a PITA given the time of the year....
Unfortunately, I hunt all day, especially during the rut. So, as you can imagine, this situation resulted in many instances of dropping the coveralls and blasting it out over the forest floor below. The first, rushed instance was a frantic realization that "I'm not going to make it down the tree in time" - and dropping the coveralls, while working my way through the safety harness was a unique, yet memorable challenge! After that, the technique became easier to master, and I soon had my own treestand-based salad shooter blaster. (Yes, I am always happy to be hunting, but this new development really took the "fun" out of the season!)
While there is lots of talk on this site about scent-control, I see little mention of this particular topic....and, curiously enough, the speckled forest floor below me really didn't seem to bother the wildlife much, with several deer feeding in close proximity shortly after a near-sharting session necessitated an unplanned demonstration of the salad-shooter technique. With a daily, nuclear bombing frequency between four to ten or more detonations, including several prizes of the daisy cutter variety, the sample size was pretty decent! Interestingly, my success rate really didn't change much, having shot opportunities at several deer within bow range throughout the season, including several mature animals. (This would almost might lead me to ask in wonderment "Who'd have stunk it?" - but alas, I know.....it was me!)
Oh well, if nothing else, I went through the season with a daily challenge of seeing how far I could reverse-javelin throw from 20' up in the air, and an entertaining endeavor to pass the time with my binoculars during the mid-day lull to judge distance and spread achievement. (Sadly, I wasn't in the Olympic spirit, for if I had been - events and medals could have been created and awarded! Gold, silver, bronze!)
As you might imagine, this also made for interesting situations, at times, when lowering bow and equipment from up in the treestand or saddle platform, climbing down in the dark, and packing up gear. On a positive note, this encouraged me to rotate my stands on a daily basis, not going back to the scene of a crime on consecutive days. So, I had that going for me, which was nice.
