Keep your head up.
You're not whining. Don't apologize for reaching out to friends. Coming here or talking to a clergyman or whoever is better than bottling things up or trying to drink the sad away or bury feels with carbs.Sorry that I'm back here to whine again, I just wish that there was some way to get her to think about this all somewhat rationally and remember how my intentions have always about making this the best I can for the kids, or that I could figure out a way to swallow the pill of giving her even more than I already have to make this go away (remembering that it's for the kids is my answer here too, but it's still proving to be difficult).
Sorry that I'm back here to whine again, I just wish that there was some way to get her to think about this all somewhat rationally and remember how my intentions have always about making this the best I can for the kids, or that I could figure out a way to swallow the pill of giving her even more than I already have to make this go away (remembering that it's for the kids is my answer here too, but it's still proving to be difficult). I am now kicking myself for not just going for lawyers up front, as my actual financial costs are looking more and more like they are going to be similar whether I just keep giving her more to get her to sign vs paying a lawyer to sue anyway. My family keeps telling me that staying in this house is stupid (and don't even know about this latest round of BS), but I'm pretty firm on how I believe that to be the best thing for my kids in the short term future, so I'll do quite a bit to keep it that way for them.
When our dishwasher dookied the bed a few years ago, we immediately found a replacement on Facebook Marketplace for around $60. We expected to replace it within 6 months. 2 years later, we still expect to replace it soon.I hear you on the house. Dishwasher broke (amid a myriad of other things) a few months ago and I've been hand washing everything thinking that the end was in sight/not wanting to sink more money into it until the dang thing is mine officially. But I might just bite the bullet and install a new cheap one, this hand washing stuff is getting old lol.
Very good advice, I think it's been said before but a good thing to keep in mind/that I've forgotten about. I should likely talk less about the details, I don't think I've said anything yet that would have negative repercussions but you are right and I'll be more careful. I've debated deleting the whole thread here and there, but more from regretting putting myself out there like this more than thinking there would be some legal ramifications. It's hard trying to walk the fine link of venting and wanting to give context of how I feel, without possibly overstepping and engaging in something that could be portrayed as slander or something that might hurt me or my "case" but I suppose it is what it is, and in reality the context I'm trying to add doesn't really matter. Some parts of life suck a lot harder than others, and this is one of them.I’m not sure if this has been mentioned anywhere in the past six pages of posts, but if she and her law firm have access to this site or these posts I would suggest you be very careful of what you say and post here and how it could be used against you optically. Aka read aloud in court against you somehow.
Also, if you can go to a gym and crush steel and work out, that will help. There is nice scenery there also and possibly new friends.
As mentioned before about mutual friends, locations, or whatever. If they go with her, let them and don’t look back. Not worth the stress or potential negative repercussions and affidavits they could fill out about you and things you did or said. The less they know the better.
Sometimes I’m oddly comforted / inspired by the message “happiness shouldn’t be your goal”… Jordan Peterson is usually pushing something like this. Feeling down? Do the work (work, exercise, kids, volunteering, whatever). Feeling great? Keep doing those things. Make as many good decisions as you can, take responsibility, and happiness is more likely to come along with that, but don’t even expect it.Doesnt matter if we are at the mountain top or the bottom of the valley, we have to keep moving. The moving is easier when we remember joy is a choice. Regardless of the circumstance, we have control over how we view and process our situation. That's certainly not to say that choosing joy is easy but it is our choice. You seem to be doing a pretty good job of keeping that perspective. It's a great lesson and example for everyone, esp those in your immediate circle.
Glad to see you’re getting the final stages of this thing man. Just want to say congratulations on handling this like a man, doing it with your kids best interest in mind, and going to a place where you can express yourself and feel heard. Believe it or not there’s probably a majority of people in this life that haven’t done those things. Be proud. Also, I want to say in the loneliness front, I felt the same way after my breakup.. especially at the tail end of all this Covid isolation I was as lonely as ever.. don’t be afraid to put yourself out there. Ask people out for a beer, say hi to people, go to places where people are doing cool stuff, like the gym, church, gun range, yoga clasa, whatever. Truth is most of us are all looking for more friends, and you seem like a decent person, so I think it won’t be hard as long as you put yourself out there and don’t fear/take personal any rejection or awkwardness. )I finally was able to file everything a few weeks ago, got the hearing scheduled ... For right in the middle of my September trip. So I just filed a motion to postpone (so many hoops to jump through, have to give her a copy and drive the paper to the courthouse to file in person etc) so hopefully it gets changed, otherwise I'm researching lawyers to appear for me, fingers crossed still ...