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Raw Emotions

redsquirrel

redsquirrel

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Feb 19, 2014
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NJ
This story hasn't ended yet but I'm putting in in the unsuccessful hunts thread because I screwed up. Tonight I took a shot that I should not have taken. I'm not making excuses for myself but rather doing some self reflection. By the time the shot occurred I was pretty emotionally compromised tonight and I feel that it led me to make a bad decision on taking this shot. Usually I limit myself to a 20-25 yard shot but tonight I took a 35 yard shot. The buck stepped out in an open area exactly where I had ranged so I knew the exact distance. I had been practicing out to 40 yards this year and in the 2 seconds I had to make the decision I went for it but I know I shouldn't have. I have a history of bad buck fever and I will never say I've overcome it but I've managed to control it by doing a couple things. I do not take shots from the ground on my way in, I only take saddle shots. This puts me in an environment that I'm familiar with and I make less impulsive decisions. I've limited myself to 20-25 yard shots. Ultimately at this range I'm less likely to make a bad shot.
So why was I emotionally compromised? I have a few things bothering me going on with out house and my personal life but that is life and you always have to juggle stuff. That state was raised by the frustrating chain of events on my way into my hunt. Tonight was a kayak hunt and I've been using my nucanoe with a trolling motor. The motor died about 200 yards out so I had a long paddle to get to my spot and then I'm running late. I got set up and started settling in and then 15 minutes later 2 shotgun blasts nearly knock me out of the tree and the steel shot rains down over my head. Next time I hunt that spot I'll have to consider when duck season opens. At that point I decided I needed to get the hell out of there so I bailed on that spot and headed to the other spot I have set up in the area. I finally get set up in that spot with an hour of shooting light left but I'm just in a generally grumpy mood. The buck walks out 10 minutes before dark and I let it fly. I'm not exactly sure where I hit but I am guessing it is low. He dropped and turned. I thought I might have shot under him but I found a little blood on the fletching and the start of a blood trail. It was wet and the arrow buried deep into the mud so that degraded that sign a bit. As soon as I saw blood I turned around and backed out. I already made 1 stupid decision tonight I wasn't going to make another. I'll go back and pick up the trail in the morning but I'm less than optimistic. My impression of the shot and how he ran off lead me to believe I just caught some meat but I won't know until I try.

I'm not posting this looking for any pity or even any advice. I've been through this before and I know what I did wrong and I know what I need to do now. One of the things I try to do on this site is keep it real. I hate the popular hunting culture that tv has created. Unfortunately this stuff happens in hunting, bow hunting in particular. I always try to learn from my mistakes but I'm only human. Tonight I'm going to bed and I feel like I'm going to puke. And it's my own stupid fault. I felt like I needed to write this up while I'm sitting here feeling like this so that others can understand that when this happens to them they are not alone. When a new hunter posts that he feels like this and I tell him it happens to us all, well here it is. I have been bow hunting for 21 years and it happened to me tonight. It is not the first time and I'm sure it won't be the last time but it still sucks.

I'm going to go out in the morning and put in my best effort. Remember when I said I get buck fever bad? Yea, that means I have a lot of experience tracking. I've gotten pretty darn good at it and if this deer is dead I'll find him. But if I do it won't be because I made a good shot.
 
Appreciate your candor. I talk to myself every time going in to the stand to reiterate that even though I feel confident at long ranges I never want an animal to suffer and a good shot is required. With that said, a 25yd shot that dropped a small buck in his tracks allowed me 10 minutes of watching him pass with me wondering how I could have made a better shot. As much as we prepare nothing is scripted in hunting. Prepare as much as possible, make your best decisions, and live with what happens.
 
That sure gives us all something to think about!


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Sounds like I’m not the only one that has experienced that roller coaster of emotions. Good luck tomorrow. Hope you find him.


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I was just talking to someone yesterday about this. Killing can get messy. I don’t care how much you practice, how perfect everything is, there are just so many things out of your control that could happen. Even at a slaughter house, the killing doesn’t always go perfect. When you commit to kill something, you better be willing to except any outcome. You can do your best to prepare for the most ethical outcome and that’s all you can do. In real life there is no edit button.
That would make a good shirt. “Real life has no edit button”
 
Been there several times and fully understand what you're going through. It happens to all of us once in a while. Chin up, positive thoughts and go find that buck. Good luck!
 
I've felt that gut wrenching feeling as recent as last year. I agree with @bigjoe, if you didn't feel the way you do, somethings wrong.

Good luck tracking this morning. I'll be keeping an eye out for the hero pic!

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I know that feeling all we can do is learn from our mistakes and try again. The personal stuff tends to cloud our thinking and actions. Hang in there man make the effort to find him if you don't remember in nature nothing really goes to waste
 
As someone who can drill an armadillo at 45 yards and completely muck up a 10 yard shot on a deer I know exactly how you feel. I wanted to add a single pin slider on my bow this year. After careful thought I decided single pin was all I needed but I didn’t really need it to slide. Good luck finding the buck this morning. Hopefully it will all work out and the buck will be bedded close by. Remember what you tell everyone else that it’s just part of bow hunting.
 
EricS said:
As someone who can drill an armadillo at 45 yards and completely muck up a 10 yard shot on a deer I know exactly how you feel. I wanted to add a single pin slider on my bow this year. After careful thought I decided single pin was all I needed but I didn’t really need it to slide. Good luck finding the buck this morning. Hopefully it will all work out and the buck will be bedded close by. Remember what you tell everyone else that it’s just part of bow hunting.
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Switching to a fixed single pin (hha brushfire) and taking the peep sight off was the best decision I ever made regarding archery tackle. Anything inside 30 is in big trouble, but I can't mentally make myself push past that. Which is a good thing.

Pin on deer, pull trigger, profit.
 
Frustration builds character.... but it sux at the time. The point I want you to think more about is that you still put yourself in the right spot that evening - most don't (heck I have not seen a buck while hunting this season and I have had rain washouts 3 out of 4 hunts). Get up, dust yourself off, and get back in your diaper - next time the buck wont be so lucky.
 
You weren't hunting in Michigan were you? :) Just had a friend call and her friend has an 8pt expiring in her backyard. Police were called to dispatch it (on the way) and I'll be heading over there in an hour to retrieve it.
 
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