I wish I had pics of the canoe load I carried last year. Went camping with some sure enough yuppies. My luggage consisted of a single dry bag with a hammock, sleeping bag, change of clothes, bag of trail mix, and a life straw bottle. It fit under my seat.
They filled the rest of my canoe over the friggin gunnels. I had 4 ice chests in my boat, and miscellaneous crap shoved everywhere. I paddled that load solo, and actually led the pack. They were all paddling sit-ons, with the exception of two guys in a 14ft poly canoe.
They legit spent more time packing, unpacking, and futzing around with gear than camping. I rolled up to camp, grabbed my bag, and told them my contribution was hauling that junk, not unloading it. I drank beer and watched herons for 2 hours from my hammock.
HEY, you left "beer" out of your original gear description. That item alone had to take up more space that Dave's boat could haul! lol (Just kidding, Dave).
Your story reminds me of the time my sister and BIL came along on a Clarion River weekend float-camping trip. The goof BIL insisted on bringing along a battery operated TELEVISION. He wouldn't listen to a word of advice. He was so disappointed that he couldn't watch the big golf match because there was no reception in the river valley. BTW, who in the hell wants to watch golf on a river trip?
River trips sure separate the men from the boys when it comes to outdoor skills. This ain't car or RV camping. It's REAL camping.